Winning Once and For All

I hit the steering wheel and cursed at the pain.

Running late in Monday-morning traffic, I thought, “It is just too much. My ex-wife gives me grief on the weekends, and I have to fight Jerry all week long!”

Far ahead, the light turned green. I hit the steering wheel again, though not nearly as hard.

“But I have had enough!” I thought. “Jerry will either change his attitude this morning, or—.”

A sports car cut me off; I hit the brakes and felt even angrier.

When I finally pulled into work, I jerked the car to a stop, slammed the door and headed straight to Jerry’s cubicle.

He was on the computer, his back to the opening. I clenched a fist and said, “Jerry!”

The man tensed and slowly turned his chair.

I leaned into my words: “I need that report by noon tomorrow! No excuses! This has gone on way—.”

Jerry was nodding, as he interrupted, “Sure, I have it all ready for you.”

He reached up and pulled it from the shelf.

I stood speechless, staring at the first page.

Eventually I stuttered, “Oh, well, uh, good.”

Glancing up, I half-heartedly asked, “Uh, how about the McGreggor work up? You know, we really need to get on it."

Jerry said, “No problem, I have already started. I will have it for you ahead of schedule.”

I realized my mouth was open. I quickly shut it, nodded uncertainly and left.

Later that afternoon, I was back at Jerry’s cubicle. I stood there hesitating; finally, I knocked on the partition. Jerry swung around with a smile that died.

“Hi,” I said nervously.

Again I hesitated, then asked, “Why the sudden change? I mean, glad to see it, but why?”

Jerry looked embarrassed, as he said, “Well, I just decided to get a report in on time for once.”

Feeling even more uncomfortable, I slid into the other chair and said, “Look Jerry, this has been bugging me all day, and I really would like to know.”

Jerry dropped his eyes, scratched his head and eventually said, “Okay. Well. It felt like we were in a struggle. It even seemed like I had to fight you.”

I was silent.

Jerry looked up and said, “I kept thinking that this struggle with you was a miserable way to live. Anyway, I decided to let you win.”

In a flat voice, I repeated, “Let me win.”

“Well, yeah. It felt like a fight, so I imagined letting you win. I hated the feeling, but it was the only way I could think of to change things. I mean, when I was not fighting you in some outside way, I was getting back at you in my head.”

Not knowing what to say, I stood to go and mumbled, “Uh, yeah, okay, thanks.”

Saturday finally arrived, and I was on the way to pick up my children. I decided to let you win had been echoing in my mind all week.

Even before the door was fully open, I heard my ex-wife’s irritated voice: “I absolutely need the children home on time tomorrow, or is that just too much to ask?”

I looked away, jaw tight, as I thought, “Will it never end?”

I turned to her angry face and forced myself to say, “Good morning. About last weekend, I really am sorry about being late. Tomorrow we will be back a few minutes early.”

A scathing retort died on her lips.

I pushed myself a bit harder and added, “Oh and speaking of a bit early, here is the support check.”

As my children ran out the door and into my arms, I felt an overwhelming rush of relief, as I realized, “I can let her win.”