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Let Me Be A Blessing

by Cassendre Xavier

Years ago I had a job working as a server at a mom-and-pop Southern style breakfast joint. I was very unhappy there, because I had to be up so early to get to work it was still dark out (it was winter time which made it even more unpleasant), tips were bad (low), and I ruined 61 consecutive days of raw veganism by eating the meal that had been presented to me at the interview. (I felt I "had" to accept it, lest I destroy or weaken my chances at getting the job.)

 One usually miserable morning as I was walking from bus stop to restaurant, I went right from praying, "Please help me get out of this job," to "Let me be a blessing." I love moments like this - when we are given a moment of clarity and wisdom, to tune into our inner wise selves, and listen to the angels' whispers of love...

 Walking into the restaurant, I felt different - free. I didn't have to worry about what would happen that day that would make me miserable. Suddenly the focus was not on what would happen outside of me, and to me, but what I could create from within me, to send outwords to others. I saw myself as a true server now, no longer as a taker. I was not looking for tips, and how to "get" them. Now I was looking for love and how to give it. I was looking out for the love within myself.

 Whereas before I felt resenteful of my patrons, past, present, and future, all of whom either did tip badly or whom I expected would if I served them... Now I felt totally neutral. They had nothing to do with my happiness, because now I saw my happiness as being the direct result of my outpouring and expression of love. I didn't even care how my efforts would be received - that part wasn't my problem. I was simply assigned to love. Only I didn't intellectually know that at the time. I just sensed that being a blessing would come effortlessly to me and that I would be shown when the time came, how to be this way, on a case by case basis. 

 I don't know exactly how or what happened, or what I did, but for that day and every other for the rest of my time there, I had joyful exchanges with my customers, who n ow, suddenly, tipped very well!

 Did it have to do with my smiles? Or my having released the need for them to tip me? People can feel energy, and perhaps now they could feel that I didn't need them. I was simply there to serve them. Whatever they did was their choice, and they were not my source of joy. When we are not being demanded of anything, we can relax and show our love. When we are with people who are relaxed with, smile at, and are kind to us, we want to return that kindness with our own smiles and relaxed feelings.

 That is what happened, and I never forgot it.
 In February I moved in to temporarily stay with a partner I'd been seeing. 

 For various reasons including the fact that we weren't in a serious, committed relationship, he was not keen on making a copy of the housekey for me, even though I was trustworthy and had hinted at wanting one more than once. Having a key would make it much more convenient to get back and forth and not have to rely on someone being at the house when I arrived in the evenings. I even offered to make a copy, which would have been very easy for me to do at the little shop across the street from my office. When he said no again, I didn't pressure.

 I let it go and started focusing on being a blessing to the household (him, and his adult daughter who commutes to college). 

 Very soon after I put it out there in the Universe: "Let me be a blessing..." I was sweeping under the couch when a little keyring with two keys showed up in the dust.

 I didn't know they were keys to the house - I just knew they were keys. Later, when I gave them to him, he said, "Oh, these are housekeys." And he let me keep them (for the duration of my stay, that is). So, in one fell swoop, and with no significant effort on either of our parts, a problem had been solved. 

 I was thrilled to have the keys! Now I come and go as I please, and I don't have to call or text first to make sure anyone's "home" to let me in.

 I highly recommend this "Let me be a blessing" prayer and intention.

 Try it anytime you feel you are in a funk with your relationships or at work or at home or temporary residence. For when we seek to be a blessing, we too are blessed!

Cassendre Xavier is a $15,000 Leeway Transformation Award-winning self-described “multi-media healing artist” who writes, records music and guided meditations, and creates community cultural arts events. She has written for Wisdom Magazine’s webzine since 2009. Visit her storefront of recordings, and books of poetry and inspiring essays  at http://cassEndrExavier.wordpress.com

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