Resurrection: Hide & Seek

If you’re going to be happy

Be happy with God.

Similarly if you’re going to be sad

Be sad with God.

A. Hussain

It’s been a little over 2 years now. Through a series of events life jumped-up and bit me. Not once, not twice, not three times. It was the fourth time-when the dagger pieced my heart- that finally put an end to me. I must say that I have not completely healed or recovered and really don’t expect that I will. Sometimes things change you . . . and there is little that you can do about it.

No matter how many doctors I see or medication, pain killers, and tranquilizers I take- they do not deaden the pain I sometimes feel and see all about me; I can no longer stand to see others sad, hungry, ill or fighting with each other. I do not understand why we cannot just get along and be kinder to each other. Certainly, there is enough of everything- if we would kindly share our lives and this planet’s wealth. And when we don’t, I can no longer tolerate the small minded, selfishness of it all.

You see-in that moment when I died- it was love that saved me. God bestowed a kiss upon my forehead and in that caress; I realized I was not alone. For you see, now, I look for God in the smallest things; and like a shy playmate, He/She laughs in our game of hide and seek. Sometimes, I glimpse him in my wife’s smile, or in my daughter’s phone call. At other times, I draw closer through my own heart’s mourning song and experience again- ‘all that matters is love.’ Yes the poets and song writers had it right all along. Everything else is an illusion; a reality show we participate in and help write the lines too.

You might ask- what is it like to be dead? Not really much different than before- only now I see through the veil and know what is lasting. Having died- I know what I can take with me and what truly lasts. Also, I am more sensitive to the pain of others and my own failings.

You might call me mad, crazy, and depressed or a dreamer; yes, I am all of these things; however, now more than ever I try not to hurt others, help whenever I can, and look for the Beloved in each person that I meet.

You see- we are still playing our game of ‘hide and seek.’

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Also by Dr. Bitkoff, A Commuter’s Guide to Enlightenment, (Llewellyn, 2008) and Journey of Light: Trilogy, (Authorhouse, 2004); these books are available on Amazon.com or from publisher. To contact author go to www.drbitkoff@yahoo.com.