Big Love - Secrets from Soulmates Arielle & Brian

Arielle Ford, author of The Soulmate Secret: Manifest The Love of Your Life With The Law of Attraction and her husband Brian Hilliard, a business consultant, answer your questions about life, love and relationships. They believe that whether you are eighteen or eighty years old finding Big Love is always possible. Email your questions to: soulmatesecret@yahoo.com

Dear Arielle and Brian,

One year ago I discovered that my husband and my best friend were having an affair. As you can imagine, I was heart-broken and devastated and left him. I was fortunate to find a great coach who has been helping me work through the pain and grief and I finally feel like I am ready for new love. Some days I am happy and sunny again and anticipating a future with a new man. But other days I wake up sad and lonely and convinced I’ll never find love again. What am I doing wrong?

Thanks for you help,

Annabelle

Dear Annabelle,

We’re so sorry for the betrayal and terrible time that you went through. Getting a coach was a smart move and guess what, you’re not doing anything wrong. Given what happened, it’s natural to have feelings of sadness, anger or resignation pop up from time to time. Here are some suggestions on how to move through the experience:

1) Get out the egg timer and set it for 5 minutes.

2) For 5 minutes close your eyes and dive deep into the feelings that are coming up for you…don’t resist on any level, just allow yourself too embrace the full (possibly unpleasant) experience of your sadness, anger, doubt, etc. Look and see where in your body the feelings reside, feel them and then see if you can feel them even more intensely.

3) Breathe deeply during this process and with each exhale, breathe out the emotion while silently saying to yourself thank you and goodbye.

Chances are before the 5 minutes are up, all or most of these feelings will have dissipated. This is because you have stopped “resisting” feeling those feelings and you allowed yourself to be fully present with what was true for you in that moment.

4) Now, get out your journal and make a list of three things you can do in the next week

that will make someone else’s life better. This can be anything from taking an elderly neighbor shopping, to serving food at a shelter, to a variety of random acts of kindness.

Our favorite line from A Course In Miracles is this: “The only thing that can be lacking in any situation is that which you are not giving.” Want more love? Give love. You get the idea. As you begin to experience more and more love in your daily life you will find your heart will ripen and open up and you will get back into the game of love…again…and find the soulmate of your dreams.

Many blessings,

Arielle & Brian

Arielle Ford has spent the past 25 years living and promoting consciousness through all forms of media. She is one of the founding partners of the Spiritual Cinema Circle, a DVD club dedicated to providing movies about love and compassion. She is the author of seven books including the HOT CHOCOLATE FOR THE MYSTICAL SOUL series and her newest book THE SOULMATE SECRET: Manifest The Love of Your Life With The Law of Attraction. Her husband and soulmate Brian Hilliard is a business consultant with a life-long interest in spirituality and the practice of compassion. They live in La Jolla, CA www.soulmatesecret.com and www.soulmatekit.com

Disclaimer: Arielle Ford, Brian Hilliard, the Big Love column and its publishers assume no responsibility for any consequence relating directly or indirectly to any action or inaction you take based on the information, services or other material related to this column.