Change Your Conversation, Change Your Life
by Malinda Dowsett
“What you talk about, you think about and what you think about, you bring about every single time.”
Malinda Dowsett and Lani Barna
co-creators of the
Change Your Conversation, Change Your Life Movement, 2010
“Change your Conversation, Change Your Life,” has started a movement destined to change the lives of participants for the rest of their lives. The creators of this program, Malinda Dowsett and Lani Barna, share their vision.
“Our mission is to touch a million lives, and for that million to turn around and touch a million more so we are all creating a karmic wave of changing conversations together.” ~ Malinda and Lani
To attain this goal these two inspiring women designed and developed “The Power of Conversation” interactive workshops, online learning program, group seminars and special self study groups to teach people how to change the internal chatter of their mind, using a tool they already use everyday – their conversation. The Power of Conversation offers some of the best one-on-one coaching through a variety of electronic mediums today.
Change Your Conversation was founded on four basic understandings that apply to every event and circumstance of your life: Thoughts, Feelings, Inner Guidance and Choice – the “how” of the Law-of-Attraction. In all their programs Malinda and Lani demonstrate how to manage thought and move life beyond the physical senses to find the inner peace and joy we all seek by letting go of junk we carry around for years, overcoming every day hurdles and getting on with the life we want. As Gary Zukov, author of “The Seat of the Soul” puts it, “Spiritual growth begins with emotional awareness.” The key is knowing that our true, inner self is the energy behind every thought we have. Deliberately changing our conversation – the way we talk about our life – changes the vibration we hold ourselves to and every experience we attract into our experience. These women clearly demonstrate that when you change your conversation, you will change your life.
Malinda's story. “After being married for six years, separated for a year and then losing my husband to suicide in 2005, my life was in complete shambles. On the outside everybody thought I was doing pretty well until I decided to remarry a year later out of complete fear. At that point in my life I had never been so scared. I was raising two children on my own, running my own business and totally separated from myself. All my life I thought I was supposed to be married, work hard, be a good mom, a loving person and the rest would come out in the wash. When my husband died I wasn't sure what direction I was moving in. I felt lost and completely alone.
“My conversations with myself were ones of despair, guilt, depression, and anger. I didn't think I had it in me to stand on my own two feet – as a matter of fact I didn't want to stand on my own two feet. Deep down I didn't think I was capable of taking care of myself much less my children. I woke up every morning wanting someone to just take it all away. I didn't have the strength to deal with the enormous pain I was carrying around. I thought if I just kept going, all of it would eventually go away.
“Two years into my second marriage, I had totally isolated myself from all of my family and friends. I was emotionally and mentally at absolute rock bottom. My second marriage was incredibly unhealthy, every thought I had beat me up, tore me down and left me feeling angry, depressed, anxious, guilty, and with no self-worth. Through it all, I denied, ignored and dismissed the fundamental emotional patterns that were driving my life and my life reflected this pain back to me. I knew I was destined to repeat the same pattern if something didn't change. It was like waking up each day and rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic knowing that the end result would keep repeating itself as a complete disaster. Unless I wanted more of the same, I was going to have change from the inside out but where to begin? Then one day I received an e-mail from an old friend, Lani Barna.
“Lani and I had not spoken in two years and her e-mail was a wake-up call. We very quickly picked up right where we had left off spending long hours on the phone talking about what had come our way and where we were in our respective lives. Our conversations had always been on a more spiritual side, and during the time that we had lost contact with each other, Lani had begun a journey on her own, studying the non-physical side of herself, her thoughts and how to control them. Through her studies and research she had become quite advanced in her thinking and in our conversations she began sharing her new-found knowledge with me.
“On a personal level during the same period of time she was struggling with her own life. She was fighting her own battles following a near death experience in a car accident, divorce and a terminally ill mother. She ended a career in corporate America, leaving a well paying job and the prestige of an important sounding title, in order to move her mother into her home and care for her during her remaining days.
“Living quietly with her mother, Lani used that time to rediscover who she was and reconnect with the side of herself she had lost bit by bit over the years. When she wasn't caring for her Mother, she studied everything she could about being human and what this thing we call “reality” really is. She studied quantum physics, neurobiology and consciousness. She searched the internet, subscribed to cutting edge newsletters and read book after book. Without the noise and distraction of a daily commute and endless meetings, Lani found – and began to feel – the energy side of herself again. She felt as if she was meeting herself again for the first time. She discovered that her shift in perspective provided her with an incredible opportunity to learn, grow, and finally take control of her life.
“In all of life we discovered the need to stop asking ourselves the question, “Why is this happening to me?” and start asking ourselves the question, “Why is this happening for me?” There is a cosmic difference in these two questions. The first one leads us down the path of victimhood, martyrdom, or feeling that there is something wrong with us. The second one takes us down a path towards deeper growth, spiritual awareness and healing.
“Our experiential knowing of this fundamental truth quickly changed our conversations from ones full of negativity and “what is” to the spiritual journey of personal growth we were both embarking on. We began helping each other move past what we had created in our lives that no longer felt good - inside or out – by slowly letting go of false expectations of ourselves and others and coming to terms with the personal responsibility and accountability for all that we had, and continue, to create.
“As Lani and I peeled back the layers of our lives we discovered that there were four principles involved in the process of creating every experience: thoughts, feelings, inner guidance and choice. We stepped back and looked at every experience that no longer served us. One by one we resolved each through forgiveness and a sense of profound gratitude. Rather than pushing others to change their ways to make us happy, we let go of judging and saw every experience as a gift to more completely discover who we are and what character we are made of. Are we courageous? Are we kind? We saw every difficult person as a way to more clearly express our core beliefs. Is this really what I believe a marriage should feel like? Is this really the relationship I want with my kids? We used every mistake to help us become more clear about our purpose and how the law-of-attraction works in our lives. Is this really who I think I am? Is this really what I want to be? We realized that every conversation we have with ourselves and others either builds us up or tears us down. We learned that when we get to the place where we become aware of how each thought makes us feel, we can always choose a better- feeling thought by getting quiet, becoming clear and using contrast as a way to determine, once again, what we really want.
“As soon as I started applying these four principles of thoughts, feelings, inner guidance and choice to the big things in my life I started seeing more and more opportunity to move my life in the direction that I really wanted to go. I started to feel like I was gaining back control of my life. I started to feel a little more like me. Everyday I started finding my strengths again. I began building myself back from the ground up again. My life began to turn around.
“I separated from my second husband shortly thereafter, and with new eyes and an open mind, am now living on my own. I purposefully and intentionally create the loving home I always wanted for myself and my children. I have become incredibly quiet after letting go of all the drama and breaking through all the major issues in my life. I have found enormous strength and gratitude from every life experience that caused me pain. Releasing beliefs and ideas that no longer served me opened up a huge amount of space in my life for the things I truly believe in and desire. I am no longer in limbo. I am living my dream.
“After a year of helping each other turn our lives around, we knew that we wanted to share this information with others. We wanted to help anyone and everyone understand that our mind is meant to serve us, not control us. We wanted to demonstrate how easy life can be if we would but relax and get to know ourselves. Life is supposed to be abundant, fun, exciting, adventurous, expanding, and ever-evolving. This was knowledge worth sharing. This was information we knew would help others understand that they do not have to suffer unnecessarily any more. Change Your Conversation was born.
“In January 2010 Lani and I took a leap of faith and began teaching others how to use life's contrasts to create a better feeling life. Speaking in front of groups of people ranging from women of domestic abuse to corporate executives, we show people in a very real way how to use a tool they already use everyday – their conversation – to identify their core beliefs, become clear about what they want, what their purpose is and move. In less than a year Change Your Conversation has become an overnight success touching thousands of people with real stories and changing lives. Today more than 12,000 people follow our daily inspirational thoughts and teachings on human potential and purpose. We call it “The Power of Conversation.”
Take heart ... you are not alone. Join us on a journey of self-discovery. Learn the science of being human. Understand that our thoughts are like a magnet and to think is to create.
“Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” ~ George Bernard Shaw
We challenge you to start today. Take the first step towards creating the life you desire by entering into a powerful conversation with us that will change your life forever. Go to our website www.changeyourconversation.com and complete the contact form, send it to us and we will help you begin a journey of a lifetime.
“Our mission is to touch a million lives, and have those million turn around and touch a million more, creating a karmic wave of changing conversations together.” ~ Malinda Dowsett and Lani Barna
Every one of us has the ability to create the life that we want.
For more information go to www.changeyourconversation.com.
Malinda Dowsett is the co-founder of Change Your Conversation LLC. After losing her husband to suicide Malinda started on a spiritual journey of self-discovery. Learning how to change her conversation, change her vibration and change that which she was attracting into her life, she changed her life. Today Malinda strives to touch the lives of those who are ready to have the life they deserve.
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