The Bliss Mistress Guide: Embracing Mis-Takes

On the Sunday of Memorial Day weekend, I awoke to a brilliantly sunny morning, following a torrential thunder storm that knocked my power out long about 3 a.m. until 4:30 or so. At 9, I climbed into the Jeep, looking forward to a short, uneventful ride down winding Bucks County, PA roads to my ultimate destination called Circle of Miracles. It is where I have spent many a Sunday morning for the past 10 years or so and it nourishes me spiritual and emotionally. These folks are family of choice who have seen me through all manner of love and loss, despair and delight.

This time the speaker was Lou Tenaglia, someone I have known for many years who never fails to inspire with his stories, bringing with him his soothing voice that lulled me into a zen state, even before he got around to leading the meditation part of the service.

Once upon a time, Lou was a public school principal. These days his classroom is the world as he shares his wisdom in workshops and with clients, and does sound healing with Tibetan signing bowls. The theme was Keys To Moving Through The Inner Worlds Of Spirituality. Quite a mouthful, but also profoundly simple. Lou presented ideas and concepts that were familiar, but as often happens, I heard them in different ways than I had previously. Perhaps it was the cleansing and clearing effect of the rain that had passed through the area. Normally I take notes during what might be called a sermon in a more formal service, but the universe was playing a joke on me and my pen wasn’t allowing me to write consistently. I just listened and absorbed Lou’s message and literally once he was finished speaking, my pen suddenly started permitting the ink to flow onto the page. The message was ‘pay attention, this one’s for you.’

Here’s what I gleaned from it. He spoke of the soul contracts we have with those we encounter as prior to our incarnation in human form, we are asked if we choose to learn lessons about love. When yes is the answer, another light being volunteers to be our teacher of the practice that goes along with the curriculum. For some, that teacher is a perpetrator of abuse, for another it might be an addicted parent, for still another, it may be someone with a physical illness. I immediately thought of a person who has been out of body for many years, but who was one of my most profound teachers. Our relationship was filled with love and fraught with challenges. There have been times when I wondered what would have happened, had we not been in each other’s lives. The answer remains the same. I wouldn’t be who I am now and would not likely be doing the things I am doing, had we not been married and had he not died more than 13 years ago. I am speaking of my husband Michael. I’m clear that I engaged in agreement with him eons ago to meet as we did, to create Visions Magazine together, which brought with it all manner of life lessons in and of itself. In my nearly 12 year marriage and the 10 year run of the magazine, I learned about my strengths and vulnerabilities. It was the soil in which I planted my garden of delight….writing. It was the mulch/compost pile where I dumped my co-dependent tendencies which ultimately became fertilizer for my growth.

It was also where I learned to embrace mistakes. I was a conscientious child who always wanted to ‘do the right thing’, not make waves, not rock the boat. The song from Guys and Dolls (Sit Down, You’re Rocking the Boat) is now playing in my head. Whenever I would do something counter to my best intentions, I would find myself (or lose myself) verbally harassing myself and as is the way of the Universe, I taught others how to treat me and so it would reflect back in my business and personal interactions. I also reinforced it for too many years until I realized that a course correction was in order. One of the things Lou spoke of was the idea that judgment is like Velcro, that holds it to you. Whenever I judged myself or Michael as being wrong for whatever we were doing or saying, or not doing or not saying, I was clasping it to me all the more. Lou defined pain as judgment of the mistakes; that I now see were mis-takes in need of do-overs.

Another analogy that Lou used, that I have worked with for years is that of a radio dial and the frequency it emits. On one end of the dial is what I call WLUV and at the other WFER (love and fear) and I can choose at any moment, which polarity to inhabit. WLUV plays songs and tells stories that are inspiring and nourishing and WFER broadcasts music and messages that are destructive, angry and harshly critical. Why would anyone consciously elect to tune into the latter station? Habit, unworthiness, self-sabotage, would be my answer. When we enhance the frequency and raise the vibration, the music is that much sweeter. Forgiveness is one of the keys to doing so. Over the years, since Michael passed I have over and over, offered and asked for forgiveness for the things that were unresolved in our marriage. It is an ongoing healing process that is opening the door to all manner of miracles in my life.

I am learning to open my arms wide and embrace the joys and challenges, the miracle manna-festation and the mis-takes, guessing that they might be one in the same.

Edie Weinstein (Bliss Mistress) is a colorfully creative journalist, inspiring motivational speaker and Bliss Coach, interfaith minister and the author of The Bliss Mistress Guide To Transforming the Ordinary Into the Extraordinary. www.liveinjoy.org