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Ask Your Mama

by Mama Donna Henes, Urban Shaman

Are you cyclically confused? In a ceremonial quandary? Completely clueless? Wonder no more.

*Ask Your Mama™

Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Spirituality and Didn’t Know Who to Ask™


©Mama Donna Henes, Urban Shaman

A Question of Healing

Dear Mama Donna,

I have a friend who has been very sick lately with lymphoma, HIV related

KS, and an embolism. Can you suggest anything from your bag of healing aids that I can get for him?

Worried in Wisconsin

Dear Worried,

First of all, I thank you in the name of all human and holy comfort for being such a good, caring friend. Your healing intentions add blessings to his life and yours and to all life everywhere.

Secondly, please know that my work is in healing the psyche and the spirit, rather than the physical — if there is, indeed, a difference. So that is what I will address.

It is important for you and your friend to understand that healing and curing are not necessarily the same thing. Curing is about reversing the effects of illness; returning the body to health, if not precisely the way things were.

Healing is about dealing with the current state of affairs and coming to terms with the situation and adjusting to the new reality with equanimity. That is not to say to resign to being ill, but to accept it as a challenge to learn some deep lessons. This process is not only healing, but can also be curative. Attitude is all.

How is your friend’s spirit, his outlook, his way with himself?

One of my clients just succeeded in transforming her thyroid cancer. She had been bitter, but determined to get better. She fought the disease with fury. She had chemo and radiation, which succeeded only in making her sicker.

But at some point during her ordeal, she realized what her body was trying to tell herself. Since she had not listened to the messages from her body or her own deepest inner wisdom for 50 years, it needed to explode — into an invasive tumor— to be finally to be heard.

She came to realize that her cancer was all the suppressed words, anger, outcries that she had swallowed all her life. She made friends with her body instead of hating it for letting her down. She began to embrace the disease as a part of herself, which it was — her own cells that burst through the repressive boundaries that she had imposed on herself.

Her realization led to her healing. In her case, she was also cured.

Encourage your friend to engage in activities that will nourish his soul and help him live with a positive attitude. Journaling, meditating, visualizations and drawing are all excellent ways that pave the path to our self-knowledge and centered outlook.

Annie Dillard wrote, “I cannot cause light; the most I can do is try to put myself in the path of its beam. It might not always be possible to cure someone. But we can encourage a profound healing.

Send blessings spirit support to you both,


*Send your questions about seasons, cycles, celebrations, ceremonies and spirit to Mama Donna at: CityShaman@aol.com


Donna Henes is an internationally renowned urban shaman, ritual expert, award-winning author, popular speaker and workshop leader whose joyful celebrations of celestial events have introduced ancient traditional rituals and contemporary ceremonies to millions of people in more than 100 cities since 1972. She has published four books, a CD, an acclaimed Ezine and writes for The Huffington Post and UPI Religion and Spirituality Forum. Mama Donna, as she is affectionately called, maintains a ceremonial center, spirit shop, ritual practice and consultancy in Exotic Brooklyn, NY where she works with individuals, groups, institutions, municipalities and corporations to create meaningful ceremonies for every imaginable occasion.



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For All Your Ritual Needs : MamaDonnasSpiritShop.com

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