Love Without Agendas

Love in long term relationships provides wonderful opportunities for maturing spiritually and learning to self- love and self- nourish.

What we want from someone we love may not be what they need to give all the time; and it may not even be what we need to receive all the time. Likewise what they may want from us may not be in either of our best interests. Despite appearances, this is all good.

Love is like fruit, it is ripe in its season and to pick it too soon spoils the feast. Like a fruit bearing tree, it will bear ripe fruit again and again, but always in its right rhythms and seasons.

Loving long term requires us to trust the cycles of coming close together and focusing on each other and then moving further apart to focus on individual responsibilities and interests. Finding a balance and rhythm to this connecting and separating creates a dynamic energy that builds intimacy and love within a relationship.

We may need to surrender our agendas of how a relationship should look in order to find out how our relationship actually looks when it is working properly for us. An 85 year old friend of mine says there are as many ways to do a relationship as there are couples. I like this. That means each of us gets to discover what works for our relationship uniquely. If you have ideas of what relationships that work look like, think again. Being open to your own authentic relationship is like opening the windows of your house to let the sweet breeze blow through. Let that breeze awaken the love and desire for closeness that lies in its own unique way between you and your partner when space is given for the rhythms of love.

Learning to comfort and nourish yourself is essential in long term relationships. Where the rhythms of together and apart leave you periodically unfulfilled by your partner, you have the opportunity to nurture your own true nature and explore your gifts and interests independently. This stimulates soul development and the fulfillment of your contracts for growth in this life.

Most of us have a lonely, wounded aspect of our soul. This is an ancient emotional longing caused during our birth into individual lives out of the absolute Oneness from which all life springs. During the process of ascending back into unity with that One, a process we are undergoing on earth at this time, this longing can be a catalyst that calls us back into connection with the true and eternal love that is at the core of all life. When you feel that longing, rather than filling it with work, food or another person, open your heart to a connection with the Essence of Truth within you and which surrounds you. You could call it The Essence of Truth, God or Goddess; it is the One that exists within all things.

No partner can fill this primal loneliness and longing, and no job or food will satisfy this need. It is our inner driving force, calling us to evolve back into Oneness with all of life, but this time we do it while maintaining our unique and individual selves. We won’t disappear into the All That Is; the unique focus of love that we are is eternal. We will merge with that Oneness again and again throughout eternity and return to ourselves to grow more whole and complete because of it. Our little human relationships can grow to reflect that same process. We can periodically merge back into deep loving unity and then separate to grow more fully into our potential and truth.

Ascended Master Saint Germain helped me with this process. During meditation about my relationship, he told me I had to surrender what I had yesterday with my partner so I could experience it born new again in the future. He taught me to comfort myself during the phase where we felt less connected and to use that time to heal and grow more whole within myself. I am forever grateful for that.

The rhythms and phases of closeness and separation provide fresh energy and opportunities for new life to be born within your relationship. Nothing can remain the same for very long; life always requires growth. Growth requires letting go of what was in order to receive the new that will come. It is fun to anticipate the new that is coming when you feel what you’ve had before receding for a time.

During the phases of moving apart, rather than seeking another partner, try building your relationship with yourself and the loving spirit of the One within you and all around you. This takes you out of relationship addiction and into spiritual growth and evolution. Then when your relationship comes back to focus on your partnership you will have much more aliveness and joy to share.

If your relationship doesn’t regenerate itself, then it is time to move on and discover what your next journey of love might look like. You can trust that love will always return as long as you are loving yourself and growing stronger in your union with your spiritual source. It may take longer than you want sometimes, but that means you need to invest more into the self-love end of the equation. Perhaps there is a karmic balance that is needed to be achieved so that your self- love is strong enough not to be lost when you find yourself loving someone else very strongly too. Sometimes it may be that your soul doesn’t want you to get trapped into a limiting relationship before you are whole enough in yourself and settled enough on your true path to attract the person who can grow with you on that path. Your relationship with yourself and your eternal spiritual Oneness is the foundation on which true partnership can be built.

Eve Wilson is a naturally gifted intuitive healer, able to read the aura and the soul’s contracts, healing the root cause of disease for humans and animals; also training legally accredited Healer Practitioners since 1986 through The Healer Development Program and Ascension courses. Her classes reach people around the world via Skype or phone. She is skilled at helping people and the planet through the current changes and ascension. Visit her website for The Weekly Word for Healing and Ascension and more information www.spiritualhealers.com . evew@spiritualhealers.com - 734-780-7635.