The Bliss Mistress Guide: Leaving the Building

Potential trigger alert: This article will be speaking about a controversial subject.

A few days prior to writing this, I received an email that caused goose bumps and a sinking feeling in my stomach. Someone I know, who is part of one of my circles of friends, had ended her life in a dramatic manner. The friend who had sent the message, had asked for prayers for releasing of her soul, that she might find the peace that she was not experiencing prior to ‘leaving the building’. I had met this lovely etheric looking woman several years ago, but can’t recall the initial connection and had seen her twice last year; once at an outdoor music festival and once at a party at the home of mutual friends. I had no clue that she was experiencing physical illness that caused what I now know was extreme pain. She seemed so vibrant. She was a dancer, minister and healer. She had countless people in her life who adored her. The truth is, we never know the full extent of what goes on in people’s lives.

Her partner, who is also a friend of mine, as well as her son and other family members and friends are devastated. One of my first thoughts was of the shock waves this has sent through our community. It is always so when someone commits suicide. The ripple effects are endless and go way beyond the immediacy of intimacy.

The night that I first heard, I spoke with a dear friend who has been a long- time friend of this man. They happened to be together when he received the news that changed his life in an instant. “Surrealistic,” is how my friend described the scenario as he and another man who also was with them, held him as he sobbed his shock and grief. Both of us are professionals in the mental health field and have walked clients through the darkness of suicidal thought into the light of healing. Neither of us had the adequate words to describe what we were feeling that ‘one of our own’ had taken such a step. Even now, I find it hard to wrap my mind around it. I have never contemplated approaching that doorway, even in the midst of many dark nights of the soul. While I’m not afraid of death and have been with family, friends and patients (in my role as a medical social worker), when they passed as a result of illness or age, it isn’t something I invite. The closest I came to truly comprehending the choice was when I endured the excruciating ice pick to the head sensations from shingles last year. I wondered how people lived with chronic pain. The truth is, some don’t.

I know others who have attempted, including someone who is in my immediate circle; one of my ‘family of choice.’ It came as a result of serious illness and emotional turmoil. Blessedly, he saw his way clear back to life and together with his wife, now organizes Suicide Anonymous meetings. According to the website: www.suicideanonymous.net “Suicide Anonymous is a fellowship in which we share our experience, strength and hope with each other so we may solve our common problem and help others recover from suicidal preoccupation.” There are in-person meetings, based on the 12 step model (like AA or NA) in Tennessee, Colorado and New Jersey (where my friends are located), as well as Skype meetings that are accessible world- wide.

If you or someone you know has considered or attempted suicide, they are an invaluable resource and I strongly encourage you to avail yourself of their support.

I offer you peace, ‘Z’ that your soul dance in heaven and all those who love you find healing for their hearts~

Rev. Edie Weinstein is a colorfully creative journalist, dynamic transformational speaker, interfaith minister, social worker, BLISS coach, radio host, recovery counselor and the author of The Bliss Mistress Guide To Transforming The Ordinary Into The Extraordinary. www.liveinjoy.org